Some days suck balls because you get your 4th migraine in just over a week and a pretty spectacular anxiety attack on top of it.
Some evenings rock because you pulled it together enough to attend the first class of the semester that had you such an anxious mess to begin with.
And because you know you have a therapy session in the morning and are willing to face the music about maybe going on a daily med because things really can’t go on like this.
And most especially because your husband was nothing but supportive all day. When you apologized for your meltdown and said you knew it wasn’t fair he told you fair wasn’t a part of it. When you confessed you’d need to take a chill pill he told you he wished you didn’t beat yourself up about it. “They are there because you need them” he said, “You should think about it differently–you earned that chill pill today.” When you told him you couldn’t get it together to make dinner he said he’d take the boys to the pizza place around the corner.
So you get to swallow the pill of chill, sit alone in the house, write a quick post, eat a couple of peanut butter Kandy Kakes, and know that Z and the boys will be back with an order of mozzarella sticks for you in a few minutes.
I’m not in a good way, people. And frankly, I’m pretty scared about it. Hopefully I’ll be able to write more about it tomorrow, but tonight I need to try and calm the fuck down. The second of a two parter of NCIS should help. Thank you god-I’m-not-sure-I-believe-in for stupid television and amazing husbands. Although, if you are also responsible for anxiety disorders, well, I’m sorry but you can suck it.