Friends. Smart, smart friends. I’m bugging you again because I need help. Clearly I can’t to this parenting thing without a ton of backup. So can we talk about pacifiers?
T wasn’t a pacifier guy. From day one he showed little interest. When C was an infant he didn’t use them either. Then one day last spring he was fussy while our lovely babysitter was over. She found a pacifier somewhere in the living room-it came home from the hospital with us when T was born. I know, gross. I should have thrown it out, you know, several years ago. But the damn thing shut C up.
I know people have strong feelings about the use of pacifiers. I am not one of those people. T didn’t like them, so I didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about them. C was very late to using them, they provided a lot of comfort for him so I really didn’t give a shit. An added bonus was when he went through that stick-every-fucking-thing-you-touch-in-your-mouth phase the pacifier blocked him. It was hilarious to watch and he didn’t get dirt and grass and stuff he could choke on in his mouth.
A while ago our pediatrician told us she was totally cool with pacifiers, but she warned us that kids start to really get addicted to them at 18 months and the habit becomes difficult to break. He is 18 months at the end of February. We decided we’d “wean” him from the pacifier when we got back from our trip down south. But when we got home he was still a sick little boy. Also, you know, breaking him of the habit is really hard. I think the addiction boat sailed a little early with our guy.
He has the pacifier in and out of his mouth all day. But at night he needs it to sleep. And when it falls out he freaks and cries. And he really won’t go back to sleep unless I nurse him. There have been nights where I’ve nursed him 5 times, although the average is 2. He is going on 17 months old. It’s fucking ridiculous. And not to be completely selfish, ok who am I kidding, I’m always completely selfish. So yes, to be completely selfish, I fucking want to sleep through the night. I’m tired. C’s tired. Z’s tired. T is fine, totally well rested. Z and I resent the shit out of him.
So what do I do? How to we get him off the pacifier? Do we just pull the bandaid off? Do we take it away during the day and let him have it at night for a while? Do we put him down without it and give it to him when he wakes? Should we just give him to gypsies? What did you do with your pacifier addicted child? Did you send him/her to rehab? Was it expensive? Did the quite in your house while s/he was gone heal you and make you into a functioning human again? Can we send both of them to rehab? Please? HELP ME!