Hot Date

Today is the 15th Valentine’s Day Z and I have spent together. We are spotty celebrators at best. Last year I did nothing for him while he surprised me with this

valentine 2012

He found the print online and made me the frame. I was flabbergasted because we’d agreed to skip it. But that is how he likes to give gifts-when they are unexpected.

This year I got him a cheap-o 6 inch Darth Vader holding some Hershey’s Kisses that will go straight to the boys. And he ran out of time to do anything. But. We do have big plans. We know how to keep our marriage exciting and fresh. We know how to treat ourselves and carve out serious time. At 5 pm tonight we are…are you ready for it? Have I built the excitement up enough? Do you think we have an awesome and enviable and completely functional marriage? At 5pm tonight we are going to therapy. Happy Valentine’s Day Motherfucker!

Our marriage is very far from perfect. We almost split about a decade ago because marriage is impossibly difficult. And, to be fair, my epic mental breakdown played a pretty big role in all that. I still worry about the marriage falling apart. He’s less worried about it, but he worries less in general. One of the biggest things that helps get us through the day to day of this crazy endeavor is going to therapy. There isn’t a single fix for every marriage. But we can’t help it, we tell all our friends to fucking find an awesome couple’s therapist. In the wise words of Professor Lupin (movie version), “It helps, it really helps.”

Do I really want to spend Valentine’s Day talking about the shitty parts of our marriage? Nope. But it’s not like we’d be doing anything romantic if we didn’t have the appointment. It’s part of the work that we’ve agreed to do to try to keep this old truck of a marriage running. We are doing the work, damn it. And on top of it I still think he is sexy.

early morning

Early morning Valentine’s Day cuddles. Just so you know, there are totally pants happening here.

star wars valentines

Star Wars Valentine’s! He was making Vader and Boba Fett fight. I tried to explain to him that his choice made no sense in terms of the content of the movies, but he just ignored me.

moster truck valentine

And nothing says Happy Valentine’s Day like a monster truck that plays “Funky Town”. Yeah, that was a terrible choice, or should I say capitulation, on my part. And really, monster trucks? Why do they have to love monster trucks?

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